After some self-assessment I realize that I have been with the same company for fifteen years doing jobs that pretty much proprietary to the business. So, this is a chance to expand my resume, gain new skills, and see what I'm worth on the open market.

I'm in a fortunate spot, I have a spouse who makes good money and I have enough in savings that I don't need to work ASAP. I can really take my time working on myself and do some of the activities on my bucket list as well.

Monica's Bucket list:

1. Go to Australia
2. Learn to sew
3. Meet Jason Mamoa
4. Get my MBA
5. Scuba dive
6. Get married in Las Vegas
7. Write a novel
8. Have dinner in the Eiffel Tower
9. Sit courtside at a Cavaliers game
10. Lay on a beach in a cabaña while being served drinks

So, I'm going to get started ( for the billionth time) on writing a novel and maybe I'll buy myself a sewing machine and start making my dogs really cute clothes to wear around the house. No, they don't want to wear clothes, but I think they are so cute in them and in the end that is all that really matters, right?

I'm also using this time to look into graduate schools to set the foundation for my new career!

Seriously, What am I going to do now?

Well, for starters I'm going to look at this change as an opportunity. It is really tough to lose a job you love. It's even harder to lose it when you're staring down the barrel of forty with a mortgage, bills and major responsibilities not just to yourself anymore.

But, this is still an opportunity.

photo from wikipedia

Have you ever read a memoir or a attended a conference by a  successful person like Richard Branson or Tyler Perry? Have you ever stopped to think what they might have in common with you? The answer is Failure. They both endured major failures and setbacks in their careers and now both of them are on top of their business fields. Love them or hate them, the truth is they are successes.

I might not ever reach their kind of success, but I know that this setback is not the end of Monica. I am worth more and owe it to myself to build my career now that I no longer have a job. See what I did there? I admitted a major truth to myself and to you, I was working a job. Just something to pay me the money I needed to live. I liked it, but it was just a job and now that its gone I can start my career.

That is the hard part, transforming my skills into a career instead of just looking for another job.

Now, how do I transform myself?

Too much instagram........

Is it really body confidence or honoring your curves if you're wearing 7 layers of make-up, eyelash extensions, a sew in/clip-in weave, four inch heels, and tinted contact lenses?

I have been asking myself this question as I look at celebrities on magazines, watch YouTube and view instagram. There are so many grown women out there that say they're body confident, but do so behind a mask of faux everything

Not knocking looking your best, but your best implies YOU and only you. Not all the products that you can buy to make yourself into someone else that is prettier and better than you, because underneath that mask you are still telling yourself that you isn't good enough, and that's just sad.